Kaius – Labor & Delivery a Home Birth

Rejoice in the Lord’s Redeemed. This is the story of how I had a home birth with my second son, Kaius.

From before even the moment that Kaius was conceived, God told me that things were going to be different. In August of 2017, God began to speak to me about His blessings that He would pour out in our life. That thing would be different from the past with Gabe.

If you read my post about getting pregnant with Gabe, you know that we used metformin to help us conceive. Also, if you read the next post, you know my labor and delivery with him was anything but pleasant. In August, I felt like God was telling me that I was going to get pregnant that month and I had finally (thought) I had figured out what was causing my liver issues. I stopped the metformin and was trusting God for the right timing on me getting pregnant again.

We were already trying and it had been several months of nothing at that point. I got excited! I knew when God said things were going to happen they did! So, as that cycle came and went with a negative pregnancy test I questioned whether I heard right. I continued to hope and I continued to trust that when I heard God say I would get pregnant that I would.

In the meantime, my sister got a positive pregnancy test. I was slightly excited slightly jealous. She started investigating midwives and birth centers for her pregnancy. I decided to go with her since I knew it was only a matter of time before I got mine as well. I had been contemplating what to do about my labor and delivery because of the ICP. I was 90% likely to get it in my next pregnancy, which generally means an induction at 37 weeks. I had already visited one or two other birth centers in town and was also considering going with the dr and hospital I had ended up with Gabe at. Or, would I risk it and go for a home birth with the chance of being transferred again?

On the day we went for a tour of one, God showed me the verse Isaiah 30:21 Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.”

We went to the tour and immediately fell in love with the patient midwife. She was our age, also pregnant and personable. She answered all of my questions even ones relating to ICP. This was it. Joy surged in my soul because I knew God was going to use her to birth a new hope in me that I lost after labor with Gabe.

Around mid-September, God showed me the verse Isaish 43:19,

“See, I am doing a new thing!
    Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the wilderness
    and streams in the wasteland.”

I was beginning to wonder if I should start some type of natural supplement to help or if I should just keep waiting. I prayed and told Kyle we would wait and see one more month then try something. By October 1st, I got a positive pregnancy test! I was elated. I knew this was going to be different. That this pregnancy was from God and things would be completely different from Gabe’s. It was such a glorious answer to prayer and new hope of what God was going to do in this pregnancy.

The whole pregnancy I just felt peace and joy about the upcoming home birth. Things were different because I was resting in the promise that God was redeeming something in me. I took progesterone the whole first trimester, as I had with Gabe, due to low progesterone because of PCOS. Other than that, things were smooth sailing.

By the middle of my pregnancy, I was itching a bit and got worried. I asked my midwife to test me for Cholestasis. I was ready for anything. Surprisingly and not surprisingly, even with the slight itching, everything came back normal. I had started some liver support supplements and vitamins to keep everything running smoothly.

Leading up to labor and delivery with Kai, I was extremely nervous about going to 42 weeks and not going into labor. In TX, legally midwives cannot delivery babies prior to 37 weeks or after 42 for home births. So, starting in my 38th week I began a supplement that helps your adrenal gland. By 39 weeks, I added 3 red raspberry leaf capsules 3x a day to help with effective contractions. In addition to those, I pumped several times, bounced on a ball, and added in 3 (1000 mg) evening primrose oil capsules vaginally two nights in a row.

When I went for my 39th-week appointment on Tuesday, I was a bit discouraged because my midwife said that his head wasn’t engaged at all and I wasn’t dilated at all. She also warned me that second-time moms sometimes had really quick labor and to let them know as soon as possible so they didn’t miss getting there.

On Friday, for the majority of the day, nothing happened except for some house issues that we had to call a plumber in for. Our ac had backed up and caused a huge amount of flooding underneath it. It was stressful and not the right time for us to be dealing with it because the baby would be here any day. And that would cause some complications with having a home birth with no air conditioner in the middle of June! Thankfully, the plumber unclogged it and got everything working correctly. I noticed while he worked that I was having some tightening in my uterus but nothing painful or consistent so I just ignored it.

That night, as we got to bed around midnight, the tightening seemed to be happening regularly but still not painful. Around 1:30 am I woke up to Gabe kicking me and I was pretty irritated and went to take a bath. I realized while I was in the bath they were coming to every 5 min but still not painful or even anything.. around 4 I started to feel them but not in a painful way just there. I was back in bed trying to sleep but would be woken up with every tightening. Not because of pain, but more like an awareness that things were happening.

I went back and forth about telling the midwife but since they weren’t painful. I didn’t want to be the girl who cried labor and really I hedged on waking people up. So, I rested through them and text my birth people at 6ish… Kyle and I were up with Gabe most of the night. For some reason, looking back now I think maybe he knew something was happening too, he wasn’t sleeping well. 

When we got up that morning, Kyle was supposed to go to work even though it was Saturday. He also had planned to take our mower to get fixed. I was still on the fence about whether this was false labor or real, but finally decided it was better he stay home rather than risk him missing everything. We decided we would go out for a nice breakfast and go ahead and send Gabe over to my sisters to be watched. 

Kyle took Gabe to drop him off, and I decided to stay home to prep for the home birth by taking a shower plus put on makeup. Who wants to have a baby and not look great?! 🙂 After the shower, it was like 9sh and they were picking up in pain. But still not unbearable. I was putting on makeup, listening to music and stopping with contractions to dance around through them.

When Kyle got home, instead of going to breakfast, we decided to go to Walmart since we needed groceries and I thought the walking would help. At the rate I was progressing I thought it would be this evening or tonight or even tomorrow cause it seemed slow. I had talked to the midwife several times and assured her that based on the pain that I had with Gabe, I couldn’t be more than a 2 to 4 in dilation.

As I danced and stopped with contractions, it ended up taking me an hr and a half to do my make up because I’d have to stop and dance or squat through the contraction. I was blasting the Greatest Showman soundtrack and having a good time. Finally, we left the house and headed to Walmart around 11:07 am. I had hired a doula for this birth, and the plan for her was to join us at noon back at our house. 

I had a contraction in the car, which seemed to kick up the pain level and intensity but I still managed to sit through it and get to Walmart. When we got there and right as we walked in, I had another contraction. The thought crossed my mind that I should’ve stayed home and this wasn’t the best idea. Why did I come to Walmart? But we needed groceries, so we carried on and I determined that we would just be quick about it.
Around 11:35ish, I start thinking I need to get home I need privacy to get through the contractions. I had been finding empty aisles with every contraction and trying not to have everyone stare at me. Kyle, who had started timing them at Walmart, asked if we shouldn’t call the midwife and have her come? I said Nah, this must just be like a 5 or 6 cm. Walking around they were getting pretty intense around 2.5 to 3 min apart but only lasting 30 seconds so I thought I had plenty of time. I was told that as you progress in labor, the “real” contractions start lasting longer and in transition, you shouldn’t have any break between them.
Finally, I decide I need privacy and start to panic a bit in my head. I communicate to Kyle we need to go. I need to get home. I’ll walk if I have to. I felt a sense of urgency for privacy and getting home at this point. We were done with grocery shopping anyway and head to check out. On the way, I had like two more contractions and the one while Kyle was scanning things and checking out, I start to walk away to deal with the pain and feel this pop.. my water broke.
It was the strangest experience. I was like ah oh and felt it start soaking my pants like a trickle but no puddle on the floor or anything. In Walmart! Like a movie.. I panic a little and laughed a little. I turned around and walked past Kyle telling him that we need to go now that my water just broke.
I am immediately dialing my midwife and heading for the door thinking that Kyle stopped what he was doing and was following me. The midwife says she is on her way and asks a few questions. I feel a little better with her on the way and my contractions had stopped. I stopped to stand where you get a cart trying to calm down realizing that Kyle hadn’t followed me out and waiting on him to come. While I wait, I attempted to see what my pants looked like but couldn’t see past my belly, so I decided to head outside to the car. 
Kyle finally comes out and has the groceries. I realize while I am standing there we didn’t bring anything in case my water broke so I pulled something together to use as he loads the car. The car ride back was extremely painful. My contractions had become something on another level, especially sitting in the car, and all I wanted to do was get on the toilet and try pushing a bit plus get in a hot bath for some pain relief.
Thankfully the house is all but 5 minutes away. I rush inside to the toilet. I’m having a lot of pressure so I was trying to relieve it and had heard if you sit on the toilet and push a bit it helps. As I do this, I am attempting to Start the bath up, but burn my foot cause I couldn’t adjust it while I was I with the pain and on the toilet. Kyle comes in and helps me. I finally get in. It barely helped though. It was now about noon, and my doula shows up right on time. She begins helping with counter pressure and making sure we didn’t need anything. Thankfully, even though they were painful, the contractions seemed to be 5 minutes or more apart now. The training midwife who would be helping with my birth was the next to show up around 12:10 or 12:15. She started getting set up and brought a doppler in to check on baby. 
Finally, around 12:33 pm my lead midwife arrived. Between contractions, I was still laughing and talking and had a rest period between so I thought maybe I was only a 6 or so and headed into transition. Of course, I hadn’t been checked yet. The lead was talking to me about where I wanted to birth. Then she asked if I wanted her to check me. I was like sure and had to turn around in the bath for her to get access since the toilet and Kyle were in the way otherwise.
However, as soon as I turned I was like no I need to push. My body just took over. It felt like the exorcist and it just started pushing. At first I fought it because I wasn’t ready thinking that I still had to go through transition to be ready. It really surprised me and threw me off guard, and (TMI) it hurt my butt so bad. As I fought the push, I was saying, “my butt, my butt, my butt”. The contraction ended, and the midwives immediately had come over to help encourage and guide me through it. She said, this is great you can do this. Okay, now push or it’s okay you are going to get through it, only 10 more minutes then your baby will be here. I remember distinctly thinking when she said that how I pushed for 2 hours with Gabe and didn’t believe that it would only be 10 minutes this time. Sure enough though, I pushed through the contractions and he was born at 12:46 pm. The third and final assistant midwife didn’t even make it before I gave birth. The one who had warned me about second time moms not giving them enough notice to make it in time. 

God Is so good. I was worried about going 42 wks and worried I would have to induce myself. Instead everything unfolded in just a magical way and I was able to have the home birth I thought I would have had with Gabe. It just so awesome how it happened because I didn’t even know I was really in labor for most of it and then it went so fast. He was born healthy at 6 lbs 13 oz, 21 inches long. Every time I think about his home birth I smile and see how God did completely redeem all the negative things I experienced in Gabe’s labor and delivery.

As Psalms 18:30 says, “God’s way is perfect. All the LORD’s promises prove true. He is a shield for all who look to him for protection.”
It was everything I could’ve wanted and more. It gave me renewed hope and trust in God to see his promise fulfilled in such a magnificent way. I know that no matter what happens in this life when God gives you a word and you cling to it not letting fear dictate how you react, you will see God’s hand stretched out.
That leads me to the labor and delivery story of the third. It has been a mix of good and bad and holding on. I don’t know the ending yet, but I do know that I leave it in God’s hand and trust him to write a beautiful story it too will speak of His love and His mercy. It will glorify him whether it turns out as miserable as Gabe’s did or as wonderful as Kai’s birth. If I continue and wait to see Him move, he will move mountains and I will praise him either way!
Stay tuned for the third and final story.
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